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Ere | After

This is a preview of a section of Chapter 6, with a shift in form inspired by lilithilien & _dirtyepic_ (thanks!)

Title: Past Performance Is Not Necessarily A Guide
Pairing: Cillian Murphy & Naomie Harris from 28 Days Later
Rating: R (RPF, Het)
Summary: Cillian receives a note written on hotel stationery.
Author's Notes: The other real person mentioned plays a soldier in the film.
Disclaimer: Completely fictional! I don't know these actors and I'm not making any money from this story.

Previous Chapters:
Chapter 1: If Looks Could Kill
Chapter 2: A Vulnerable Position
Chapter 3: Already Messy
Chapter 4: Tomorrow Never Knows
Chapter 5: Cill Me Now

White Hart Hotel, Salisbury


I thought you should know that I ran into Leo on my walk of shame down the hall this morning. Unfortunately, he found my key in the pub. He made a pointed remark about how I was wearing the same clothes as last night. I told him that you were taking care of me because I was so drunk I was yacking up, and that I crashed out on your sofa. He found it all very amusing and made insinuations... but I didn't take the bait. I just matter-of-factly told him what I told him, and then shot off down to my room.

I'm really sorry about this. I didn't mean to

It makes me feel so guilty to say it, but it would probably be best to make sure we have our stories straight... so that you're ready if (when?) our intrepid soldiers interrogate you. It would probably be pointless for you to deny that I made a move on you, given my stupid drunken flirting at the pub. Admitting that will give them something juicy to be right about -- but then you can joke about how my sick was all over the place, etc. and casually dismiss the talk of anything untoward having gone on. Just tell them I'm mortified about how drunk I got... that's

(flip page to read the back)

the truth anyway. I think if we aren't defensive and don't give them anything new to chew on, then everyone will probably just let it go. I suppose we need to make sure that we don't act too uncomfortable around each other as well... I do hope we can find a way to be relaxed around one another.

I'm sorry I ran out earlier when you were tryin wanting to talk. I just couldn't I don't really know if I should say anything else about what just happened between us. I'll admi Somehow it seems cold not to say anything... and my feelings for you are quite the opposite of cold. I don't need us to have a big talk. I just want you to feel OK about all this. Well, maybe OK isn't the right word... I just don't want you to feel bad.

I want you to understand that I don't expect anything from you. I would never get in the way of your career or your happiness. And I really don't want a reputation as a homewrecker to dog me, or for gossip or weirdness to leave a bad taste in people's mouths. We both need to be careful -- this film could be really important for both of us... and this last month of night shoots is going to be tough anyway.

But I should God, I wish I could honestly tell you that now that I've scratched the itch, you're out of my system, but I

(switch to second sheet of paper)

White Hart Hotel, Salisbury

don't want to lie. It's all I can do right now to push away the sense memory of your mouth on me... and when I close my eyes, all I see is that gorgeous drowning look you get on your face when you come.

I know that my door shouldn't be open to someone who in your situation... but I'm too weak not to confess that if you want me, I won't turn you away. It's up to you... I'll leave you alone. I won't walk around giving you the glad eye -- and you don't have to worry about any more lagered up come-ons... I'll not be drinking like that ever again.

The bottom line is that no matter what you decide to do I won't be angry with you. I can't promise I'll always be bright and sunny, but I'll be doing my damndest to be positive. I knew what I was getting into, so how could I be angry? Whatever happens -- or doesn't happen -- it was worth it, to me.

This sure ended up being longer than I intended. Yeah, right -- I didn't want to talk, did I?!? I guess it would have been more accurate to say that I'm not keen to hear what you'd probably tell me. I don't need you to explain yourself -- I don't want you to explain, OK?

~ N


( 13 meltings — Melt me )
Dec. 14th, 2005 02:37 pm (UTC)
...when I close my eyes, all I see is that gorgeous drowning look you get on your face when you come.

Oooh this is good! I love Naomie's voice, and this is a great way for her to explain herself. And so one-sided, as of course letters have to be, but I'm dying to hear what Cillian's response will be.

I especially like the last paragraph -- so simple, but so full of fear/resignation. Gah! I don't know who I'm rooting for in this story!
Dec. 14th, 2005 07:42 pm (UTC)
Yay, I'm so glad you like it!

I really debated whether she'd put any directly sexual reference in writing, because of the risk of someone else seeing it. Then I decided that it was fine because even without that paragraph, their cover would be blown if someone else saw it. Writing down any of this is a risk, and they'd both understand to be very careful not to let anyone else get their hands on it.
Dec. 14th, 2005 09:26 pm (UTC)
What a great idea with the letter! I can really idetify with her, writing stuff is sometimes far easier than saying them to someone's face and having to deal with the reaction. Can't wait for the rest of the chapter!
Dec. 14th, 2005 10:19 pm (UTC)
Thanks! BTW, who's that in your avatar photo?
Dec. 14th, 2005 11:24 pm (UTC)
Why, it's my beloved Gerry Butler, crying his heart out at the end of Phantom...love that movie, love that guy...
Dec. 15th, 2005 12:10 am (UTC)
Dec. 15th, 2005 12:37 am (UTC)
No, you're right, if that letter's found he's so screwed. If he's smart, he'll tear it up ...

... but I have a feeling you're going to be evil and have him keep it, right?
Dec. 15th, 2005 01:35 am (UTC)
Heh heh. Haven't decided yet...
Dec. 18th, 2005 05:38 am (UTC)

Sorry for the late read, love!
Dec. 18th, 2005 08:24 am (UTC)
(Deleted comment)
Jan. 4th, 2006 06:11 pm (UTC)
Hey, thanks for the great review! I was moving a little more slowly than expected with the latest chapter, because it moves into a new zone. I did some more research and some plot brainstorming for a while, then began sketching. But I'm writing now.

I don't tend to go to the Cillian fan forum because I already spend such a ridiculous portion of my web time on him, and it's not easy to see what's new on there -- you have to root around for it more than you do on LJ or on cillian-murphy.org. So I tend to go there only when people in Cillian LJ communities refer to a specific discussion over at the forum.

BTW - friended! And thanks for taking my poll.
Jan. 8th, 2006 04:33 pm (UTC)
Huh, great Scott. Wonderful. Wonderful. What will he say, I wonder. I like the switch in method of narrative. Great work.
Jan. 9th, 2006 12:58 am (UTC)
( 13 meltings — Melt me )